Lonely? Nope!

Now, this isn’t always true for me, but there are certain situations where this is definitely the case. I tend to start feeling pretty anxious if I’m around too many people for too long (this is why I didn’t go to many parties in college), and it’s in these situations where I almost always prefer the company of a book. Books don’t get drunk and throw their arms around me and try to force me to drink beer; they sit quietly and let me turn their pages and absorb their knowledge at my own pace. There’s no awkwardness with books, no wondering if it would be appropriate for me to start or jump into a conversation; with books, it’s always appropriate to jump into the conversation. That’s kinda the point.

I don’t dislike people. I like them very much, actually—especially some in particular. But I generally don’t like being in a huge crowd of people, even if I like them all and feel comfortable with them all. I’d just rather sit and chat with a few people at once rather than trying to handle them all at the same time.

Anyone else feel like this? I feel like some people pity me for feeling this way, but it works for me. What works for you?

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10 thoughts on “Lonely? Nope!

  1. I don’t know why anyone would pity you for being yourself. I know I wouldn’t. My sister gets the same way around large groups of people, so I know what you mean. I’m perfectly fine either way.

    I think it’s important to be comfortable enough in your own skin to know your limits. For my sister, she’s way more comfortable if people she genuinely likes and trusts are around her. If something makes you uncomfortable, don’t put yourself in those situations. Everyone has their own traits and quirks (good or bad), but that’s what helps to make us all unique! So don’t sweat the small stuff because life’s too short.

    • Yeah–my friends in college didn’t really get it. I think they felt bad for me because they thought I would feel left out if I stayed home from parties (which I often did) and I guess I did to a small extent, but I don’t particularly regret not going out and partying all the time. In addition to being uncomfortable in large groups of people, I’m also really bad at functioning on small amounts of sleep 🙂

  2. Hi Bridget,
    I am very similar to you…I am friendly and enjoy people, but I get very overwhelmed in groups and crowds, and like you, would rather retreat into a book. Have you heard of this book – Quiet: The Power of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking written by Susan Cain. I haven’t read it yet, but I really want to because it addresses so many attributes of “introverts” in this day and age. Here’s a link to a review of the book: http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2012/mar/22/quiet-power-introverts-susan-cain-review.
    Beth 🙂

  3. Like you, I also thoroughly enjoy my time spent with others. But if I have to choose between a night out with friends or a night spent reading, I will gladly choose the latter. There’s something so special and precious to me about books, that I just can’t get enough of. I wish I had a job that paid great for me to just simply read day in a day out, but I’ve yet to find one with my soon-to-be journalism degree.

  4. I generally like people, but I’ve found that I REALLY need alone time on a regular basis. I usually read or play the piano. That gives me the re-charge I need.

    • I absolutely need time alone–even on holidays when I have a lot of family over, I find myself needing to escape for a little while from the festivities and read a few pages in a book or just sit and stare at the wall if that’s what it takes to de-stress.

  5. I’m with you on this one. Books are so much more reliable and safer than people… although they can still surprise you! People make me nervous sometimes, and a quiet life is what I crave. Unfortunately I’m stuck with a city lifestyle. People can find it hard to understand that you don’t want to get drunk and stay out late all the time. As you say, being yourself is what’s important.

    • Oh man, I could never live in the city. I technically live in Baltimore right now, but we’re in the suburbs north of the city. Since my boyfriend goes to dental school in the middle of the city, he wants to move down there, and I was not at all looking forward to that–but it turns out (happily) that most places are out of our price range. Thank goodness!

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